It's a warzone out there baby, so can I just stay home and forget the world?

There are things that you can't unsee once your eyes have been opened. You can't unhear them once they've reached your ears. You can't void your heart of them either once they've broken through.

I wish I had enough time to spend with everyone. But what is enough for some is not enough for others. And it is never enough with the one you love. It is never equal, just like how life is unfair.

I miss being single, I miss having time for myself. To do whatever I feel like doing. Meet whoever I want, go anywhere I want. Have fun, relax, and laugh like no tomorrow with a group of buddies that I know I'll grow old with. I cannot and do not want to count how many of such friends I've lost already.

I don't miss the physical freedom, because I have it. I can still do whatever I want to, if I really want to. But it is the emotional freedom. Somehow, it just doesn't feel...right, to go out with my friends because it seems like it's a girlfriend's duty to spend whatever limited time together with her boyfriend. And even if I do get away when we're supposed to be together, my heart is not there. I really try, but I can't help myself from wishing that I was with him. If I'm physically away but my heart is elsewhere, what's the point?

I don't know how to rein these feelings in. How do people do it? When I becomes we and you become one half of a whole, what happens next? How do you become whole by yourself again?


I wish we had met 5 years later. It'd be so great, but then again you never get to choose, do you?

Hell Yeah 2A

Libras are horrible at making decisions and fantastic at procrastinating. Not a good mix. It's 4 months to go before I start going back to CDC, another 3 at least before I pass, so it's probably a little too early for this...but if I can't decide on a clear goal, I know I'm not gonna be motivated to save up. Random stuffs like Tiger Airways' promotions are gonna screw me over LIKE IT ALMOST DID, BUT NOT THIS TIME BITCH. And it ain't gonna be just another $1.8k this time. I want to have a bike to ride within a week of passing. And I want a bike that I can be proud of. My cute little B2 served me well but it's definitely not a bike I'm proud of. Hell, I didn't even wanna let my mum see it when I first got it LOL.

Anyway, it means that I'll have to decide and seriously start saving up like, now. No, actually, it's not about saving up, it's about not spending my savings when I see too many digits in my bank account lolol. After I publish this post I'm gonna see these bikes every time I come here to click on my own Nuffnang ads (YES I DO THAT LOL. Money is still money no matter where you get it from! *shameless*) and be reminded to fucking save. Or maybe I just wanna have pretty bikes on my blog. HAHA. But anyway these are the three that I'm considering. TOO DIFFICULT.

CB400 Revo aka Super 4 - most popular and reliable 2A bike around. Best resale value. Street bike, therefore it's all comfortable and fuzzy and all that. Fast, stable, low fuel consumption, top speed around 170km/h. Best choice for 2A transitioning to class 2. And there are fairings available at reasonable prices, so it's pretty alright.

It's the bike that I initially wanted and thought was gorgeous. But then as time passed, I realized that this bike is damn common and more often than not, they're really hideous/poorly maintained. Starting to find it a little ugly now...but nevertheless, it can be made pretty, and it's still the smartest choice if you're gonna ride it for just one fucking year.


RVF400 - Noticed this bike when I started to realize that S4 might not be the one. It's super chio and is probably the fastest 2A bike around; top speed is about 200km/h stock. It's pretty affordable too - surprisingly some are going cheaper than S4s!

Spare parts are pretty damn expensive though, so it means that I can't afford to scratch/crash into anything. 

I was set on this already, until I saw its rear view the other day... 

Holy shit man. Those tail lights. Some people love it but imho, it's so Transfomer la. Not the Hollywood Transfomer, it's like the 1900s Transformer. What the fuck man -.- Costs ~$1.8k to change, but if I do it'll become a single seater. And everyone says it'll probably come with a hell lot of problems cos of its age. DIFFICULT.

And then there's the GSXR 400R. Was toying with the idea of getting this after I was disillusioned by the RVF's disastrous tail lights. It's a pretty old bike that's more expensive than the first two with less resale value, but then again both of those were relatively cheap.

And according to reviews, it's handling is almost the same as the 600cc...

 

This might (and probably will) change in 2 years time...but I WANT THIS. Therefore, if I get the 400cc I'd have a much easier time adapting to the 600cc. But of course this is the least probable one of all. Super unpractical sighh.

Not to mention, there's a chance that in the course of these 2 years, I'll suddenly receive a lawyer's letter stating that my dad has died (boohoo), but before he did, he decided to be a good father and bestow upon me his 10 million worth of assets. Assuming that he had 10 million in the first place. And that he can remember our names LOLOL OK FINE I'M JUST SAYING THAT THERE'S A CHANCE.

And it would be such a game changer because who would give a flying rat's ass about a fucking GSXR 600 when you have 10 MIL. THIS IS THE BABY I TRULY WANT.

JUST LOOK AT DAT ASS

 

 It's everything I want from a bike appearance wise. Might not be the best in performance or the most comfy, BUT IT'S TOO GORGEOUS. Saw it only once before, and I really really really want it. But like what D drills into me whenever he can, I'll have to agree that it's just too fucking expensive and unpractical. That's why, Dad, I'm waiting for you! HAHA

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So I was almost done with writing this post last week when D's mum called. After she hung up I didn't even want to look at this tab lol. No I didn't kill someone, neither did someone get killed...but it was a letter from TP; I was 'awarded' 6 points and a $150 fine for speeding. TMD. Just completed submission of my particulars. Bye bye 6 points, it was nice knowing you guys ����

Ok lah that's all, I can't remember what else I wanted to write last week alr lol. Bye!

Nongsa Point Marina and Resort

This was an impromptu trip, only confirmed it the weekend before but it was really good!! 2D1N cos D was having his mini block leave after SCS. Omg I just realized it was on our anniversary wtf -.- should have made him pay for the whole trip as a present tsk.

Anw, that morning we almost missed our ferry but managed to make it in time (as usual)! D was super stoned the whole time we were there though cos he claims he's tired. End up made me so nua also.

Went to Nongsa Point Marina & Resort this time. Super near SG and Nongsapura ferry terminal. Hell, the ferry terminal looks like it's owned by them with all the ads lol. The total price was really cheap, about $100 per person, barely any extra charges.

Alighted from the bus and we were so shocked, cos the place was gorgeous! They have the biggest tiled roof we've ever seen, and from the lobby we could see people jet-skiing out at sea. Thought we struck gold cos it was so cheap! But sadly, it turned out that we were at the wrong resort LOL. We were at was Turi Beach, Nongsa's sister resort which is 5 min away from our actual resort. CHEH. 

FML realized I didn't take a pic of Turi Beach's lobby roof. IT IS HUGE. We shall go there next!
Can't tell from these pics but the view from the rooms must be gorgeous!

So we hung around there a little before a bus came to fetch us over to our resort. Nongsa's lobby had no humongous tiled roofs, but it was quaint and really cosy with couches everywhere and a cooling sea breeze! Checked into our room and the view was a disappointment cos we didn't get the sea view - instead we were facing some damn palm trees and a sidewalk -.- Must remember to request for rooms facing the sea! But the room itself was alright, beds were comfy and there was a big ass mirror covering about half the room.

Nua for awhile then went down to eat our free ayam penyet lunch. Yummy! 

Dragged our lazy asses to the minimart to buy snacks after that. Super pretty the buildings there.

This was directly outside the minimart. I had to get a picture though the sun was scorching hot.

We also stopped by the bar otw to our room, one does not simply resist a beer on a hot afternoon by a beach. Played pool, and I won D three times in a row by some miracle! When I hit the 8 in the third time, he took my stick from me and put it back to the shelf, so three times was all hahaha.

Super relaxing, it felt so good to be away from everything.

Retired back to our room and caught Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Omg it's so fucking touching I cried my eyes out hahahaha. Saving Private Ryan was next and halfway through that I gave up, didn't go there to empty my tear ducts.

Went down to look for food for dinner, but the menu at the restaurant was almost identical to room service, so we decided to just eat in the comfort of our room. Stopped by the beach for awhile to chill and listen to the waves. I would've happily spent the whole night there, but D didn't like the sea T.T He said his dream house would be a cottage in the middle of some meadow, but mine is one by the beach like the one in Stairway to Heaven. I guess this is it, we're not working out anymore. HAHA.

My Beef Lasagna with Cheese. Was huge, could barely finish it. Only so-so to me, not enough cheese!

D's Fish & Chips. Damn good, I kept stealing his fish haha

 

And this was the best: Fried Banana with Ice Cream. Ordered it again before we checked out despite the price!

 

Next morning we went for a little adventure! Ventured out to the breakwaters to take pictures. Wah the rocks were really rocky -.- Couldn't afford to look up at the view while walking cos if we miss a step we'd probably be in the water with a broken ankle. Went all the way to the end, and as we expected, the view was worth it!

 The yatches looked so puny from where we were standing!

So that pretty much sums up all the adventure we had for the trip. On the ferry back to SG, we sat on the deck! It's a first for me, achievement unlocked. Struggled to hold on to the bag of Ruffles I was eating the whole time because of the wind -.-

Went by our resort. The whole red area is Nongsa Resort, and the rocks were the breakwater that we were at.

 

It was a miserable after-the-rain kind of afternoon when we got back and the bike was all wet and took forever to warm up. Can't remember what we did afterwards, but I rmb taking the next day off, just because :P

Can't wait for our next adventure already!

Guardian Angel

Humans are strange creatures. They content themselves staying cooped within four walls they call home, staring at their little screens while their fingers twitch and jerk in a hypnotic rhythm.

They fear the best things their existence offers because they see the worst in anything. 

"Never be too happy because you'd only feel sad after it passes," they say.
"Love too hard and you'll only break your own heart," they say.
"Don't take risks, you wouldn't wanna lose everything you've worked so hard for," they say.
"The higher you climb, the harder you fall," they say.
To their children, "Stay home, the outside world is a dangerous place," they say.
"You can't afford that holiday, and you have work to do," they say.
"Don't party too hard, your boss might find out and fire your ass," they say.

And this:
"Never ride faster than your guardian angel can fly," they say.

But what they don't know is that we do not fly; we are inside them.
But we're caged and dormant inside, because they never seem to need us at all.

They have never risked. Never made ground-shattering decisions. Never had their hearts truly smashed up broken. Never looked their fears in the eye and went, "Bring it on, motherfuckers." Well they thought they did. But fact is, they never did.

They watch their heroes on their little screens do it. And then feel the emotions; the joy, the heartbreak, the exhilaration, the triumphs and defeats. But it only lasts for moments, for it is not of their own.

Then they open their eyes, and fall back into their safe, mundane old lifestyles all over again.


So when there's nothing to protect, why should we stick around?

CNY

This year's CNY was super uneventful. Gambling really plays a big part I guess. Can't remember doing anything much throughout, just chiong here chiong there. Went back to work feeling as shag as a regular Wednesday.

I think the highlight of my CNY was my contact lenses LOL. Super pretty though nobody noticed it, and I shamelessly told everyone to look into my eyes hahaha. And it's only $8!! Should have bought more lah omg regret. Wanted to, but we didn't buy more because we were doubting that 18mm could fit into our small Chinese eyes hahaha.

Day one! Initially planned to wear my cheongsam, but it went missing. Didn't know what else to wear so I just wore my work clothes lol. Safe clothings.

 

Left: Cousins Gen 1, Right: Sis and Mum

Day two! Pink jeans woohoo. Went to boss' house after visiting, and I won $40 from 20 mins of blackjack teehee! D and Ray came to pick me up and we went to watch a movie after that. It's so boring when everywhere's closed, I can't imagine what CNY's like for non-Chinese people.

The gang came over on Tuesday and it's the first time a Caucasian male stepped into my house! I have an ang moh aunty okay don't play play HAHA. Mum cooked spaghetti especially for him. Played cards and I lost like half of my winnings from the day before -.- but it's cool cos it's only half hmph!

Hmm I thought I took a lot of pictures but apparently I didnt. Oh well there's always next year.